Glop Damien (like from The Omen)

Great time to be a weapon formed against me, as they all seem to be prospering

You have to really, really, really fucking suck for your 8th grade teacher to come out and shame you like this. Damn.

"impossible task" Tech journalism is struggling so hard to make AI seem necessary that they've brought back infomercial incompetence

No we aren’t. We’ve been Xennials and The Oregon Trail Generation forever, nobody is trying to make Gen Goonie happen.

I’m so erect imagining even one of these things ever happening and also despondent with realizing that none of them ever will

yet again, corruption in the dems via fundraising shouldn't be seen mostly as "personally fattening individual already wealthy electeds wallets" and more as "making sure everybody's loser nephew or cousin has a cushy six figure job with benefits"

When your dentist asks who played Phil Fish in Barney Miller

People saying there are ways around this. But some of us are stupid and shouldn't have to outwit the government!

To be clear: Necrophilia is not gay.

“I’ve seen things… you people wouldn’t believe. Space stuff, like galaxy plasma and, I don’t know, beams or whatever. Crazy shit. All that stuff? It’s in the crapper now, cause I’m dead.”

A rare cameo appearance by the late, great Barnacle Jim, right

Too late, ive already depicted you as the stressed child and myself as the stoic still-faced mother

everytime i push the button i hear someone scream in another room. but they took my phone and there’s not even like an iPad in here or anything. so, you know. button time

my fav tweet hasnt been reposted on here so im taking care of that

Threads check

this man looks like a pervert from a Lifetime movie about a pervert. he looks like God forgot to finish making him and just filled in the rest with whatever was lying around the back of a butcher shop. he looks like he has been dead and rotting for several days prior to being fished out of a river

Yellow rubies glistenin', like piss

Smoked a seven gram backwood of shadow whisperer, Shit had me fucked up in the crib looking up pictures of dogs with human eyes

I ain't even gonna hide it no more, This blunt feels like a solid, fibrous piece of shit, straight up, A big meaty piece of shit, Balanced diets, lots of fruit and vegetables, Would honestly float in the water, which is a sign of good health, Husky little fella

Y'all are crabs in a bucket, and I got Old Bay seasoning, maybe even some Zatarain's, fuck it

"you need to start posting on X again" okay first of all why are you calling it that

nothing is better than buying a shirt on a whim, completely forgetting you did it, and having it show up a week later

ChatGPT is adding the signatures of real New Yorker cartoonists to its AI-generated images. So far, I've found the signatures of more than 15 contributors. "It’s slop, and unlike the other slop that I’ve encountered, this is slop that’s pretending to be me." www.niemanlab.org/2026/10/chat...

I love when Dems post on twitter telling us what's wrong, it's like thanks we know. You guys know any congressmen or something? Maybe they can do something?

it's siren testing day and it's october you know what that means www.youtube.com/watch?v=qae2...