Damion Schubert

There are lots of reasons why the Democratic Party is likely never going to die that have to do with entrenched money and power but don't forget one huge factor is that the alternatives are run by morons.

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Donald Trump bulldozed the white house and is threatening to do the same to the Kennedy Center but the thing you're concerned about definitely seems like the thing you should be covering instead

No. This is dooming for nothing. Lula *did* end up cruising to re-election, it was called an hour after polls closed. The fact that he managed to pull that off when everything was pointing to a Bolsanaro win is not terrifying, it's inspiring. Stop looking at things through the worst possible lens.

Grim but in absolutely no way surprising.

The Woke Left wants nothing more than... *checks notes* for everyone to marry a guy named Gary.

i don't think it's that crazy it's a lot harder to use public money to build a complicated interconnected grid of rail infrastructure than it is to use private money to build a bunch of big warehouses. like i don't think it's great only one of those is possible but what i do not think it is is crazy

perfect, no notes

The extent in which the person who wrote this is invited to self-fornicate at their earliest convenience is massive.

I’d say Trump isn’t as good at influencing foreign elections as Putin, but I dunno, the Serbia results are a huge defeat for Putin. He’s lost both Orban & Vucic in a year.

trying to figure out when the world went sideways and I think it’s when Popeyes stopped giving you a cup of gravy when you ordered chicken tenders

To get in the spirit of Halloween, tell a horror story in six words or less. I'll start. "The dog found the sex drawer."

I watched the original Friday the 13th, the original Nightmare on Elm Street and then on a whim, cut straight to Freddy vs. Jason and let me tell you, the tonal whiplash on THAT transition was quite insane.

This must hit so hard if you are both stupid and an asshole.

“Democrats will strenuously oppose efforts to restore things to the Obama-era status quo ante,” I say, presumably after suffering significant head trauma

The shocking thing about the 2020 primary being won by Biden winning the black vote and the south is that it's exactly why Clinton won the primary in 2016 and pretty much none of the other candidates learned a damn thing from the experience.

Dear Donald, this is your National Republican Senate Committee leader writing I am here to tell you to absolutely keep saying this shit

Yes and also this sort of 'uniparty' nonsense feels so hollow deployed in the midst of a national stove-touching. It turns out the difference between a 'milquetoast corporate Democrat' and Trump was really big! President Harris would not be driving trans soldiers out of the military!

Whatever you think of the benefits of AI and disregarding the casual misogyny, the idea that it will benefit the working class more than the college educated is fucking stupid.

Stop stop I can't vote for Talarico and Hinojina any harder

I am angry that this book about the history of ice cream does not include a chapter on peanuts.

Going to a dentist is like going to a dentist in a Star Trek episode compared to when I was a kid. Their imaging tools are so much better than they used to be, and they can print a new crown within an hour.

This is going to be not taken well by the antivaxxers who think vaccines aren’t real, mRNA is the devil, melanoma is caused by sunscreen not the sun and that constantly post stupid shit like ‘they found a cure for COVID in 12 months but can’t find a vaccine for cancer?’

Okay, I”m now rewatching the original Friday the 13th and it really is a case of a film that is so classic and central to two decades of slasher films after that that it feels so… cliched. Like, it *is* the horror zeitgeist of the 80s. (It’s also not great)

Master of Puppets in my Pants Blackened In My Pants