BIG tortoise goth gf 🐢

Ty's looking DROP DEAD gorgeous! 🔫🐢😁

Sitting in your seat and silently tsk-tsking whilst masking it as peaceful “protest” accomplishes nothing against Fascists. MLK also revoked his stance about peace. The administration of Fascism got to this point, not because of violence, but because of peaceful complacency paving the way for them.

Costco and Trader Joes are yin and yang. Together they form a harmonious balance. One sells big piles of normal food, the other sells small piles of weird food. These are the two food piles people need

if you’re neutral milk hotel in the face of oppression you are an oppressor milk hotel

We're a repubthick not a slimocracy

there aren't enough hotdogs in the world to show you how much I love you. but I am going to try.

me to all of you:

we must eat them, slowly, and with purpose. we must become fibrous; we must become closer to plant.

my tortoise and i are talking about you just fyi

haha nice post dude. I'm going to put you in the panopticon

can’t wait for polls like ‘20% of americans say “unsure” if purge is bad or not’

LOOK AT HIMB

"Oh don't worry babe, it's just 5 seconds. Plus, you can skip them!" *10 years later* "Sorry babe, time for your 1-hour ad break"

Now with farts

Getting sucked imto a tornado<<<getting sucked off in a tornado

How was your day? [flashback to me getting sucked into a tornado] pretty good

hey siri, did i cum?

A tattoo of a single tear, indicating he has killed a man

society lost something when our fiction stopped including rayguns

"someone else kill the king"

gay pa pa pa, pa pa pa pa pa gay better run run run run run run pa gay

youtu.be/Sl4JbBK--Bo?...

beautiful 🥹

THIS IS HOW ITS DONE BUDS 💥🐢💥

apropos of nothing, I'm going to write three words with no deeper message: explosive golf ball

HEY I THINK IT'S A GREAT TIME TO PLAY MY FAVORITE GAME!!!!! *REGGAETON HORNS BLARING* 🚨🎊💥✨💥🐢💥✨💥🎊🚨 UNHINGED QUOTE SKEETS W ABSOLUTELY ZERO CONTEXT!!!!! 🚨🎊💥✨💥🐢💥✨💥🎊🚨 LET'S FUCKEN GOOOO FEEL FREE TO JOIN IN THE FUN & SKEET WHATEVER RIDICULOUS & FUCKED UP STRINGS OF WORDS YOU FIND

there's a noise that Tyrus makes almost exclusively in his sleep... like he usually grunts & chirps softly, but every once in a while he'll make a noise I can only describe as a pleasantly surprised "OH!" like he woke up with a mango under his claw or something ☺️🐢😂 one day i WILL get it recorded!!

thinking about a bi girl x lesbian wlw couple where the bi girl brings boys over and gets her brains fucked out while her girlfriend sits in the cuck chair in pained discomfort on the verge of tears watching and getting so horny im about to pass the fuck out