jasper

Baseball is stupid, but it's stupid in a manner which ennobles the human spirit. Football reveals the lies we tell about ourselves and our society for the hollow boasts that they truly are.

Life is all about laundry

Thursday is a paid holiday. Because Flavor Flav said so.

incredible strategic error by Pat McAfee to reveal he is deeply bothered by relatively mild mockery from college students despite a key component of his job being "standing on a stage in front of college students for 3 hours a week"

Jaylin Williams with the kindest turnover in NBA history

guys let’s all go to bed

Forgot Wake hired Dickert last year (and not this one), but the point stands that no NC FBS team has had a coach for longer than a season and a half

You know we had to mention ULM’s wild 4th Quarter comeback with a pitchy pitchy woo woo cherry on top touchdown.

woman at the lunch place asked if i still did halloween of if i was “too old for that.” i thought she was gonna insult adults who still dress up, but turns out she wanted to show off pics of her adult daughter’s elaborate costume 🥺💖

BRAZIL YOU HAVE SHOCKED THE WORLD

I will never forget the day my parents took us to the Cheesecake Factory. The awe we felt when they ushered us past the velvet rope to our table, bedecked with cheesecakes of every description. The respect they showed us, despite our dirty coal miner’s fingers, despite not knowing how to use a fork

Early this year, I visited Ingram, a TX town of ~1,900, to check out a tip. The area was starting to recover from its worst flood in a century. But as Latino workers drove to jobsites to help rebuild, the tipster said, a cop in a black Dodge Charger kept stopping them ... 🧵

There are people, even some trans people, who think that we can give up sports to appease bigots. That if we give up on sports, this all goes away. That is a lie. I have reported on this for years, and EVERY state that passed a sports ban as a moderate compromise has gone on to pass worse.

Defending ACC Champion Duke*

Saw an old guy with the craziest drip today

Students from North Carolina A&T can be seen marching back to their HBCU after voting on the first day of early voting in the state. The Guilford County Board of Elections voted to remove the school’s on-campus polling site. (video via Todd Simmons) greensboro.com/news/local/g...

i know where the unused GPUs are stored and lately i've been taking a few at a time and throwing them into the ocean to blow off steam. nobody's even noticed

still thinking about "mario's eye view"

professor pspsps’d at the class today to get our attention like he momentarily mistook us for a gaggle of misbehaving cats

every team in college football is bad this is awesome

Remembering Katie Zacharia White House Press Secretary Monday - Friday

cleaning out my ms paint shitposts

My 5-year plan is to become one of those avalanche rescue dogs with the barrel

My reels algorithm is so fucking good now man. Pure psychic warfare straight from the White Martian

Carl Quintanilla: Real average hourly earnings down 0.7% on the month, that's the sixth straight month... Jim Cramer: Look, rich people are making a lot of money. God, I sound like Marx. I really don't want to sound like Marx. It's just, look at the data.

"For so many years, there was a really strict line in the sand when it came to sports betting. Then the tide slowly began turning internally. It was very troubling for me to see the normalization of betting and ESPN’s complete acceptance of that, and finally, they just decided to go all in."

Let's go, Sam Forstag! That's how you stand up for trans people on the national stage. If congressional candidates in western Montana—one of the most competitive House races in the entire country—can stand up for trans folks in every aspect of our lives, democrats everywhere should take note.

🚨Olivia Rodrigo announces “expectations” remix feat. Chappell Roan. Out this Thursday.

today we celebrate the man with the dirty mac who discovered america

Hi, everyone, hi, just need you to stop for a moment and watch this Tulsa TD.

🌧😷BAD NAP😷🌧

A Tennessee appellate court has ruled that the killing of a woman may have been justifiable because she was trans. The court reversed a conviction, stating that the killer could have a new trial because the jury did not know the woman killed was trans. Trans panic in the modern era.

Launching an insane website calling attention to irregularities in his birth certificate that strongly suggest that Zohran Mamdani was born in Dayton, Ohio

early reviews are in

one of the deepest sicknesses in the world are the people who feel personally attacked over other people getting the same rights as them

Christa Pike is “conscious, speaking, and continues to receive critical medical care” nearly a week after her botched execution, her attorneys said

he's a DAmm genius

she’s so happy to be a foot

I’ve covered death row cases for nearly a decade and witnessed several executions. What happened to Christa Pike wasn’t an anomaly. It could happen anywhere. With another execution planned for this week in Texas, let me explain why. THREAD 🧵

fuck every luggage company ever for making their “carry-on” suitcases /ever so slightly/ larger than the actual permitted dimensions

his joy!!! #bb28