Daniel Waites

Chemists Announce Upgraded Periodic Table With Dozens Of New Elements For Just $4 A Month https://theonion.com/chemists-announce-upgraded-periodic-table-with-dozens-o-1839288701/

ABBOTT: Japanese developers today have unique names, like FromSoftware COSTELLO: From what ABBOTT: FromSoftware COSTELLO: I thought you said it was from Japan ABBOTT: It is COSTELLO: But what's the name of the developer ABBOTT: FromSoftware COSTELLO: The Software's From Japan, though ABBOTT: Yes

MICKEY: I used to do an act with a goat. Cranked its tail like a phonograph. You couldn’t do that anymore. Not with the way the culture is now. ROGAN: Totally. MICKEY: And what they did to my buddy Br’er Rabbit. ROGAN: Insane. MICKEY: (ripping a vape) Like, we can’t even celebrate heritage anymore?

“I think in reality, what socialism actually means in the American context is lug nut squirrel biscuit meow meow papa was a rolling stone.”

Trump will obsess over these idées fixes* as he draws his last breath, gasping "Greenland…tariffs" as he tumbles from his golden toilet, coronary arteries bulging as he strains to pass a half-digested Big Mac, only a viscous paste of rectal mucus and Diet Coke to lubricate that unyielding bolus. 33

Pleased to finally announce... Abdication, the last Southern Reach novel! "There will come the days of the watcher, the drowned woman and the shadow of a man who keeps falling apart with each step, but first comes the moment the birds appear at night from the gaps between the stars, far from home."

New York City, America's financial hub, raised and distributed the capital for the ground-breaking infrastructure of the 19th century - the railway. (Image from #1846 @tomlehmann.bsky.social @gmtgames.bsky.social) Read more: cliosboardgames.wordpress.com/2026/06/14/n...

Meanwhile memory chips are increasing in price so fast that by the time Neuromancer comes out this fall you will *actually* be able to get killed in Chiba City for 3 MB of hot RAM.

when the scaffolding is finished

No.

But they were all of them deceived, for another leche was made...

this is about whether drones randomly blowing up while someone is working on them is a good or bad thing (adam is unsurprisingly on the pro-explosive mishap side of the column)

We should have never doubted this man

Average GOP Congressman: We err...uhhh...don't uh need uh...oversight of the DoD because uh...we trust the President to decide what's best Donald Trump: I AM JESUS CHRIST RETURNED TO EARTH THE POPE ISN'T MAGA AND HE'S WEAK ON NUCLEAR WEAPONS I AM GOING TO BUILD A HOTEL ON THE MOON

you can get to say slurs or you can have freedom of navigation, but it's one or the other boys

I dunno a few weeks of “maybe I will nuke a bunch of places maybe I won’t depends on how I feel” will help focus people

This is what I am talking about @radiofreetom.bsky.social

My favorite comment 😂

This always happens and then Trump tweets something like “The Prime Minister of Persia (GREAT rugs) came to me in a dream and he’s close to making a deal” just before the opening bell. And he somehow gets the geniuses on Wall Street to pretend like everything is normal for another day.

Teacher: where's your homework? Me: I, uhhh, forgot to do it My dog [under my desk holding a gun]: good good

NYT quoting AOC when she says “um”: This dumb girl can’t talk NYT quoting Trump after sticking a fork up his nose into his brain and rambling about sharpie pens: Doth thine lion howl with instincts known not learned by man, or sound his sonorous roar as prophecy to gaze back upon history itself?

It's a system of infinite reflection: the markets looking at Trump looking at the markets looking at Trump looking at the markets. The markets have chosen not to panic and so Trump is experiencing less pressure to cave and thus so far the markets are *making themselves wrong.*

Holy shit we might have a cure for sickle cell anemia

The Trump WH is starting to reap what it has sown in terms of screwing over counterparties: -Iran can't trust a negotiated settlement so why reach one? -Ds in Congress can't trust Trump to follow the law so why bargain w/him? -Universities see past deals leading to future shakedowns so why make one?

Wow -- as first spotted by @BadFoxGraphics on X, Fox & Friends this morning used *old footage of a previous dignified transfer* to mislead their audience about the fact that Trump wore a baseball cap during the one yesterday

It’s so funny to think about the fact that there’s people out there deferring every life decision to this

Oh, we're all off Discord now. I use Witchhazel now. Lindworm doesn't let you stream your screen. Paprika is actually a foreign surveillance app. Dude, send me your Dingo. I can't sign up for Jester Plus. I don't like the UI for Cabinet's mobile app. Just toss me your Spork. We're on Spork now.

BREAKING: “in my 24th year of my quest to settle the planet Mars, I have just been informed of a basic fact of celestial mechanics.”

And, I mean, Alessandro de Medici was real www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/f...

He’s just describing The American Dream but you’re supposed to hate it for some reason

Adeptus Females (rhymes with “tamales”)

Sending thoughts and prayers to everyone employed or represented or by Brad Finstad this morning.

If you haven’t tried Twilight Struggle or Labyrinth I deeply recommend them.

We'll see, but I don't think the apparent TACO on Greenland will last long. It's just another case of "last person he talked to," and that won't be the Europeans once he's back at the West Wing / Mar-a-Lago. For their own anti-NATO reasons, too many in the inner circle are determined to push this.

Any owner of CBS should be hiring CBS News executives with one mission: Putting pencil to paper trying to figure out how to export 60 Minutes success to the rest of the division, not denigrating *the* flagship broadcast for the network.

Here we go. Elise Stefanik changed everything she was, everything she believed in, for power. And in the end, Trump endorsed another dude and Elise is out. Shameful

I'm guessing this explains the lying about Trump's posts. Whatever feed this bot is pulling from (First Squawk on X has the same tweet) is spreading disinformation for crypto dipshits.

What folks need to realize about "peace talks" is that this is all theater for Washington. Ukraine knows that Russia has no intention of stopping the war, and the Russians know the Ukrainians know that. So this is just all a performance for Trump, hoping he blames the other for the lack of peace.

Google at its peak was basically the best information retrieval system in human history and they and every competitor decided going from there to “you didn’t want answers you wanted half-assed auto-complete 80%-wrong hallucinations” in a few years was the right idea

Time was if you talked to a woman like that in public a man would tell you what’s what.

If you’re seeing this viral claim that Trump is working on 15-year car loans, it’s fake.

menswear writer here 👋 camo will not hide you inside a gym