the Po' Fessor

A loud hissing in my ears reminded me that I don't pay for YT, and I needed to get my screen turned on if I wanted to hear some music Thanks, tinnitus!

So e had visible healing of their intestinal lining is still the most horrifying sentence I have ever encountered

The boys at work caught me making my GI Joes kiss in the truck and now they all want a turn like break time is infinite or something

Genuinely the best day so far in the history of this president that he hasn't slammed Canada yet that I've heard

Will you disavow the brotherhood of the traveling pants (British)

Fact

You should not vote for fascism because fascism is evil. But also, you should not vote for fascism because fascism is stupid.

I’m sorry to have to be the bad guy here but we need to recognize that we live in a compressed air thrusters world now. If you’re not finding ways to teach the critical use of compressed air thrusters in your classroom, you’re setting your students up to fail when you could be setting them up to fly

Them: Would you like some tea? How do you take it? Me: Orally. Dare I ask how you take it?

Remember that time Biden got elected so a Texas couple packed up their 3 daughters and moved to Russia because of Woke?

CLAIM: we engaged in deceptive and dangerous practices befitting a secret police in an authoritarian state FACT: see above

Is there a technical reason the papers keep writing forced labor vs slavery? I assume they just don't want to label the enslavers with an unduly harsh epithet, but there could be some distinction

PWHL please hire this person

My dad died a couple of years ago. I was looking at his old iPad today and I found a bunch of lovely family photos, but I can only see low-res thumbnails because his iCloud subscription lapsed. Are they gone forever? Can I ever get the full photos back?

Imagine there’s no heaven, It's easy if you look around

Where did we come out on perineal sunshine? We're all still doing that, right?

Hey remember when trump picked pence, and they immediately came out with a logo that looked like an IKEA instruction on giving a handy

Bob Fosse trying to pick his nose on the downlow

Morning Joe just described some guy as a "fairly hawkish military historian". So, not one of the usual hippy-dippy they/thems obsessed with trench warfare?

Christening a baby is nothing like christening a ship. I know that now. Once again I can only apologise.

If a Democrat said this, Republicans would demand they be flogged. Hakeem Jefferies would reluctantly agree, but specifically around a lack of decorum and absolutely not because the statement was wrong

9 to 5 is 60s era soul music, or the horns have lied to me. #HornSectionsDontLie

Righteously argued essay here. Triangulation also demonstrates a fundamental lack of conviction and sincerity — once you do it you can’t get that credibility back with attentive voters.

They all want to be the Oppenheimer of Death Star Ouija boards and that is not something you should want to be, even though it's a very silly fantasy

A sweet little video of Dolly saying goodbye youtube.com/shorts/U6o7Z...

I always feel a little violated when they reach into my pocket and change how the timer app works, but so far it's always way better

The unexamined life is not worth living - Socrates I pity the fool - Mr T

JK Rowling needs a password manager like 1Password because she can't handle complex characters

For me, Freedom! '90 may be the perfect pop song

You wouldn’t steal a piece of paper stored as a pdf attesting you have permission to install and play a game

"I can sniff out a segregationist like a god damned truffle pig." - Molly Conger, superhero

The WNBA really needs to figure out that what’s happening isn’t a “free speech” issue about trans people but a concerted effort to destroy the cultural cache they’ve worked so hard to build. There is no difference between the anti-trans movement and the guys throwing dildos on the court.

You must fight the yen To tickle that wren And never pinch a finch Don’t be in a rush To fondle that thrush It only makes them flinch Hugging an owl Will cause it to scowl It makes them feel absurd So just have some grace And give them their space

Pretty sure this is chicken of the woods, coming out of an oak stump in my backyard

You go through life thinking you don't want to hear from Ice T about boner pills, and you're right to not want that. Nobody should get that just dropped in their lap. That's like a _specialty_ specialty kink

Our scientists have discovered a 2nd continent: they're naming it pangea just made me absolutely furious. Come on, Sid Myers! ... and while I have your attention I really love civ6 even though I am still absolute trash at it

learning that the WNBA news cycle about trans people involves zero trans people feels like coming accross a cartoon dust cloud that dissipates to reveal there's only one guy in it kicking his own ass

I'm watching aces @ fever and I miss Grady as the Wolves announcer. This guy gets me fired up!

"You're with me" is way more badass than "come" and now I want to re-train my dog

... biggest fish in the sea You'd win the prize for sure if you got me

Wow, ok. That's one point for the YT algo. Somehow, I did want to hear Lightning Crashes right after Material Lover