Vil

Happy Wet Day proper! Enjoy your 45-60 minute showers 🚿

Until the end of the government shutdown, our campaign will be donating $2,500 a month to a food pantry in the Ninth District. And to my fellow candidates, I challenge you to do the same:

Why does everyone keep calling it “The Epstein Ballroom?” Please stop repeating “The Epstein Ballroom” because it is not called “The Epstein Ballroom!” Don’t tell the news that it’s called “The Epstein Ballroom” and please don’t repost this!!!!!

getting in a fistfight because me and the boys can't decide if "making your robot talk like Hitler" is a Simpsons Homer & Mr Burns B-plot episode, a Community Pierce & Abed A-plot episode, a 30 Rock Jack & Pete C-plot episode, or a Data & Geordi 2-part cliffhanger TNG episode

Ugh. I don't want to be alive, but my bitch wife won't allow me to commit suicide.

Safelite repair. Safelite replace.

The most unrealistic thing about the black mirror Callisto story is that a new York times reporter would do anything to endanger corporate profits. #callisto #blackmirror #newyorktimes

“What do we want?” “TIME TRAVEL!” “When do we want it?” “IT’S IRRELEVANT!”

a democratic politician calling out fox news hosts by name and identifying them as villains is necessary and has been sorely lacking

Somehow, the future is both going to be a dystopian techno sci-fi hellscape AND we're gonna have coal and measles and robber barons and a permanent underclass. Philip K. Dickens

One of the most disgusting historical analogies I’ve ever seen. Yalta didn’t include the aggressor and it didn’t exclude the US’s longtime ally in the war.

"Well, we can agree on that"

Love it when democrats praise Reagan 🤮

here’s the thing: why wouldn’t you treat every dumbass idea as potentially worthwhile when a month later you can just go “oopsies” and no one holds you accountable for giving credence to stupid shit?

hard to believe that our public institutions are suddenly behaving in a manner that many many people have been warning is the logical endpoint of a capitalist government for a hundred years

Was gonna make a joke about a cybertruck driver's kid asking their dad to drop them off a block away from school so their friends don't see them in it but then I remembered they wouldn't be allowed custody

Reporters need to say who nominated the judge in every tweet. Let's quit with the pretense. W Bush appointee.

gravity is doing a better job opposing the GOP than the Democrats are

If you wanted no leaks you should have gone into Settings -> Security -> Configure privacy & security -> Privacy options -> Other -> Configure -> Media interface and clicked “Disallow.” The Leak setting is on by default but we understand your privacy is important so we’ve made it easy to opt out

Lot of bigots showing up. Remember, don't interact. Just report and block block block.

The real lesson of Zuckerberg and Musk is that some people are just born with loser stink on them that no amount of wealth or power will ever scrub off

My culture is not your costume.

I saw the United Healthcare CEO shooter drinking a piña colada at Trader Vic's, and his hair was perfect!

Do they still make adult contemporary?

Gobble gobble, everyone! Just kidding.

2014: the movie Idiocracy is basically a documentary 2024: the movie Idiocracy is a beautiful and aspirational look at a future brighter than our own. a tantalizing glimpse into a better world that has already slipped from our fingertips.

To be clear: Fox News and right-wing commentators never stop commenting on problems in blue states - even if it's just made up nonsense. We need to talk about the deep, deep challenges in rural areas for no other reason than people need to hear about it on a regular basis.

One day I decided to become a red socks guy. I threw out all my socks and replaced them with red ones. Now I'm a red socks guy. Is that a normal thing a did?

Let's chat on WhatsApp! It's a fast, simple, and secure app we can use to message and call each other for free. Get it at whatsapp.com/dl/

I love to imagine Kurt Cobain tweeting 'Ross Perot is a teen spirit' back in 1992.

Big fan of Walz but I'm a huge fan of the established politics explainer class eating a face full of shit

I am once again politely asking the Microsoft corporation to allow me to skin and eat whoever it is that decided OneDrive was going to be deeply integrated into File Explorer.

Shadowrun

Feel like the republic would be a lot safer if the people delivering the news didn't look like supermodels.

I guess the democrats just didn't think Mike Pence was weird.

LA has a multi-ethnic population of goths.

After today perhaps we can all agree that target shooting should be a part of public education.

Back on my bullshit

this is going to switch him back to being a leftist like when cartoons get bonked on the head and go back and forth between being smart and dumb www.usatoday.com/story/news/n...

I really don't understand knots. Rope and cords generally confound me.

gofund.me/5068329d