Jonathan Beeston

Sometimes I think Don’t Look Up was too heavy handed as satire then the Wall Street Journal says “hold my beer”

My finest ever work. I wrote it on a treadmill in a gym, recording each title, as I thought of them, into the notes app.

"A care home choir in south-east London is swapping Vera Lynn nostalgia for Queen's rock classics" - quite right. If Freddie Mercury was still with us, he would be 80. www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

10/10. No notes.

Last night I watched a film with cameos from Mel Brooks, Darryl Hannah, Whoopi Goldberg and, er, Donald Trump.

If Citeh are fully guilty (looks like it), then we won the FA Cup in 2011. #goarnstoke

You can always find him in the cloister at parties.

One reason England does so well is our second generation immigrants outperform their peers which is not true in most OECD countries. We are also very good at integration. And it's v sad that this is never acknowledge in debates on immigration.

PSA: at Stansted airport, the restaurants stop serving breakfast and brunch at 11am. Including the one that advertises itself as a "all-day brunch café".

Pollution levels in London after 10 years of advancing sustainable transport.

In honor of Uber shutting down in Nigeria this week, here’s my favorite story about Uber in Nigeria.

I hear you—and I apologize. That mushroom was one of the poisonous ones, you’re right. That’s not just useful feedback—it’s you setting a boundary.

Sadly, perhaps you do have to hand it to the anti-ULEZ protestors who gifted Sadiq Khan an untaxed car and instead created a story highlighting the flaws in the single justice procedure. (Credit to PA’s Tristan Kirk who is pretty much the only person looking.) www.standard.co.uk/news/crime/m...

Such a good feature

Just because it's Sunday and I'm on tour from February next year (tickets from countarthurstrong.com). Have some of this. www.youtube.com/watch?v=hT-k...

Keen to get any tips from reformed heroin or crack addicts to stop me from eating these.

Fell down a rabbit hole into the Domesday Book and when I searched for the area I'm from, I uh

I will be taking no chances protecting my eyes during the eclipse by being inside the Southbank Centre watching Dog Man: The Musical.

Perhaps @richardosman1.bsky.social will start posting again on here if he sees what came up for 12:15pm today on my Author Clock.

I'm gonna build a vape shop and a bookies on Dobby's grave x

🎯 “Why aren't these people looking at what is actually happening, reading about what is being tried, understanding what trade-offs are being considered? Is engaging with reality really that difficult?”

Crazy solution. Still wasting medicines but now making 75 swimming pools unusable #burnhamsbritain

10/10, no notes

The first reply is 🔥

help me oh my god I can't breathe I am laughing too hard www.ft.com/content/5fb4...

And if you think tackling climate change is expensive, wait till you see the cost of not tackling it.

Wayne Rooney justifying the licence fee in one sentence.

Looks like the BBC have built an incredibly sophisticated AI model for this: "AI's predictions have been generated using Microsoft Copilot Chat. We simply asked the tool to 'predict the results of the World Cup semi-final ties'." www.bbc.co.uk/sport/footba...

It's grim up north London.

Another 90 minutes of sustained psychological abuse inflicted on the entire nation.

Someone's already made the comparison between Thunderbird's "The Hood" and Gianni Infantino, right? Should I sent it into @privateeyenews.bsky.social?

If England beat DR Congo, they will go on to play MR Congo FRCS.

Russian hackers were behind a cyberattack that crippled Jaguar Land Rover and delivered an estimated $2.5 billion hit to the UK economy, investigators concluded.

big miss for boolean functions if we don't get a Andy v Nandy race.

great details in this article about a Scottish packaged pastry

DOCTOR: "So what seems to be the problem?" PATIENT: "Mmhbbhhggr hhruuh engghhuu." DOCTOR: "I'm sorry I can't understand, but don't worry. Great singer Bob Dylan is in town. Go see his show and no matter what ails you, you'll feel better!" PATIENT (sadly): "Ehg ddnghh m'm Bddnnn."

www.maptap.gg June 5 94🎉 95🏅 95👑 93🎉 91😁 Final score: 931

Every crime in which an ethnic or cultural minority is the perpetrator used to justify repression or worse of minorities. Every crime in which a minority is the victim used to argue for the idea that ethnic diversity is inherently unstable and should be reduced or eradicated.

On this day, 2 years ago. I sat in bed and said to myself, 'Why haven't you finally made that compilation of Jim McDonald from Coronation Street, absolutely battering people to Motörhead? So I did.' Enjoy! It will forever be my greatest contribution to society.

Good morning

Random cryptic clue that came to mind: Short holy man, with a thick skin maybe, is a failing leader. (7)

The quid pro quo of a Starmer leadership was that - fine - we weren't getting a storyteller or a charisma powerhouse, but we'd at least get serious, competent leadership committed to delivery. In fact we got neither.