Harrison

If the golem becomes ensorcelled, the coven may need to assume operational burdens related to ensorcellation and the golem’s fel status. This may cost extra mana points.

i would like one of those NYT flyover country focus group panels but for EV/hybrid drivers in deep red states who got shit for years from their neighbors for driving the woke and gay electrics and how they're feeling these days

BED #: 8 PATIENT: Mike R. IN: 11:20 AM PRIMARY COMPLAINT: suffered severe blunt trauma in 10+ places inventing new dance move named "lightning feet" ORDERS: psych consult, bed restraints

if you ever happen to see someone post a joke you don't understand or discuss a subject you aren't familiar with, you are well within your right to complain, and perhaps even scold them if necessary. you are their customer and you have rights

The abject terror I felt at hearing Shaggy's normal speaking voice

Teaching residents and one medical student that you don't have to order labs on every patient every day.

grow up. it's not society's job to manage every conceivable thing that might make some idiot uncomfortable.

William Carlos Williams' roommate:

what i'm learning now is that parents with young kids all essentially feel like the walt disney corporation is holding a gun to their head. interesting

fuck i just realized my wife has never disavowed the muslim brotherhood

“i pay tax before, but still pay tax now?” We spoke with dozens of half-literate morons about the machinations of local governance. Here’s what they’re saying.

This is Tommy. Tommy had a question about my allegiances. Listen to the end to hear about his.

First the doctors say that I shouldn't swallow magnets and now they say magnets will cure my acid reflux? Which is it??

Ants have been waging a cataclysmic world war for the past few centuries

theonion.com/man-who-drin...

Hell world

I am generally against smoking, but I will make an exception in this instance

I’m at the Pizza Hut. I’m at the house of leaves. I’m at the combi s n e a v t a i e o l n fo esuoh & tuh azzip

VOTE NO on Pro 75 (the 'TAX DRACULA' bill.) If we try to tax Dracula, he will simply move away to Texas.

We have created the sneering visage upon a trunk and two vast legs in the desert from the poem "dont build a vast statue with a sneering visage as a testament to man's hubris"

Yet another example of the AmeriKKKan neocolonial empire capturing the the capital of burgeoning nations in the global south

no....no!!!!!

This is a misleading statistic because $190 billion of this is owed by MRIs Georg.

It is too late, I have already depicted myself as the άνθρωπος ίσχυρός and you as the άνθρωπος παρθένος 🫵

Any doctor who signs up for executions is by definition a fucking psychopath and so it shouldn’t be surprising that he’s also an incompetent buffoon

Tbf it also exists to subject men to ritualized abuse in order to irreparably bond them to each other so that they won’t blow the whistle on all the raping

You joined "grand vizier chat (secret)" You: dark rumors from aboard You: abroad* fuck Sssnakecharmer: mf said aboard WhispersintheChapel: ahoy matey lol PonderMyOrb changed the group name to "rumors from aboard"

Wait a minute...

This is now the entire economy

I have a solid relationship with the motion-detecting soap dispenser at work that squirts soap on my sleeve whenever I wash my hands. We are working through our issues and committed to a strong future based on mutual trust

Incredible Facebook slop ad I just got

i wouldn't even mind that they put a gun in space if they'd stop sending push notifications every time it's pointed at me

Keep honking, I am blind and navigate by echolocation alone.

Nikole Hannah-Jones w/ a sobering follow-up on her decision yrs ago to enroll her daughter in a poor, majority-Black public school rather than a wealthier, whiter private school. You leave heartbroken for the kids being failed by this grossly unequal system. www.nytimes.com/2026/09/20/m...

My enemies are amassing on the outskirts of town. Probably to apologise for their grievous misconduct