Spencer Keys

You know, I joined Bluesky because I wanted to talk about wills and trusts. Not this. [gestures at the world] Anything but this.

what no

Why did Canadians elect Mark Carney, British Columbians elect Lorne Doerkson, and Vancouverites elect Pete Fry and a bunch of COPE candidates? Allow me, the pundit, to explain that it's coincidentally due to my own beliefs about political strategy that I talk about all the time.

Between this and the Ted Cruz post, this is just MAGA copium ignoring the reality that Lorne Doerkson was elected after his party dumped a MAGA-head.

"Remember the a la mode!"

The absolute gift to the Conservatives to let them run a leader not chosen by the members.

Nathan Fielder: Do you understand why the joke was funny Elizabeth Holmes: Steamed hams is a funny thing to call a hamburger

All constitutional questions in the Alberta referendum are now leaning *No*: suffrageapp.ca/abref26/ #abpoli #cdnpoli

happy "i'm officially a published author" day to all those who celebrate (me)

DOES THIS WORK FOR TAX FRAUD?!

America now has second-generation school shooting survivors nypost.com/2026/10/17/u...

Thank god the elections are over in BC so now everyone can get on and focus on the election. #bcpoli

“The internet is a store but it used to be a library” hits me like a slug to the chest

Marc Emery managed to get a whopping 388 votes in a small town council election. That was good for dead last. www.coastreporter.net/local-news/s...

Ken Sim, Evicted. ✅

what is the charge? preventing a succulent chinese meal?

lol Scaramucci on the other site:

So I Married an Axe-Murderer for Tax Purposes

Is a group of people standing at the side of the road holding campaign signs called a Burma-Shave anywhere other than British Columbia?

The beatings will continue until morale improves.

Uh oh, did someone’s website and personal account experience a big drop in activity after Ukraine hit a Russian data center?

Brad Pitt appears to an elderly Jar Jar Binks in the hospital and tells him “Ebberyting ganna besa okeyday” in perfect Gunganese

the cuck american president: stop attacking russian oil the gigachad ukranian military: we will burn their refineries

Both the PMO and the White House breathing a sigh of relief.

Funny. The Democrats should be making that their closing as well.

Q: Many feel you have not addressed the fact your son in law is a white supremacist influencer. What have you said to your family? COLLINS: That's my family OSSOFF: Imagine running for Senate while neo-Nazi propaganda is disseminated to an audience of millions from your home. That's Mike Collins.

Ossoff's superpower is that he correctly thinks his opponent is a contemptible piece of shit and he is willing to explain why in clear and direct language. bsky.app/profile/atru...

ossof basically

Okay so we have a number now: the Onion is officially 6 months ahead of reality.

What if he was instead released into a labyrinth and chased down by the firing squad?

Q: How do you define socialism personally? JD VANCE: I think in reality what it actually means in the American context is you want to replace American workers with foreigners workers, and you want boys to play in girls' sports

What it looks like when you sequence a tortoise genome for everlasting life.

Just saw someone say their AI runs their fantasy football team and I can’t stop laughing. Like, I’m sure everyone’s doing it or something but it’s very funny to me that pretending to be a team manager was so hard that you needed to pretend to pretend to be a team manager

when you confirm with your friend that the kingsgate mall podcast isn’t coming out until tuesday so it’s fine to talk about the book launch on monday, also there are two elections happening, it’s fine, it’s totally fine, we’re all having fun anyways here are the launch details for those curious!

[car dealership waiting room] Me: [chanting] knobs, knobs- Other car buyers: knobs, KNOBS Car salesman: [pounding desk] KNOBS, KNOBS, KNOBS!

This is extremely interesting from an anti-autocracy / anti-retribution perspective. Obviously, you can pressure loyalists to say publicly they won’t convict, but you just need a few defections for them to give each other cover.

Meanwhile I’m over here getting all stressed out about returning $5 to a client.

Canada is maybe the best country. I love Canada so much that when I listen to Sloan I don’t even skip the drummer’s songs.

This could be a stupider branding exercise but not by much.

Stephen Harper has, as we've long awaited, weighed in against Alberta separatism. But man oh man, do I have to strongly quibble with him claiming sentiment was zero when he was PM. Here's a 2014 poll putting belief in separation at 23%, which is where it sits now. nationalpost.com/opinion/step...

America today is a country where regulators won't allow private companies to air interviews of the opposition on TV, but declare that taxpayer funded propaganda is fine.

The cowards in charge will never give us the live action version of *this*.

Rename the town to Come-on-Purpose and ask Dildo to pack it up.