phalange.bsky.social

mountain dew, print ad (2004) archive.org/details/elec...

“He’s got the White House looking like Saddam Hussein opened up a Cheesecake Factory” — Obama

do you disavow the brotherhood of evil mutants

New working paper: the Norwegian wealth tax was a huge success. The "exodus" of wealthy people never happened (less than 100 individuals left). Tax revenue increased by 71.5%. No changes in business activity or investment. www.nber.org/papers/w35854

If you need happiness, look at this amazing Gritty cake. Shout out @whiskworthtasting on IG

"There's no 'getting out of' a meeting. You must receive all information in a live discussion, because it is impossible to understand meeting matters through email. No combination of written words could possibly convey the meeting’s complex concepts about the job you do every day." buff.ly/k2hhGaM

Me: I voted for Donald Trump because I had him confused with that other guy. Donald Duck. NYT reporter: Are you sure you want me to print that next to your real name and a drawing of you? Me: Yes.

Lehigh wedged themselves between North Dakota and South Dakota in this week's /r/FCS Poll. Which got us thinking...

“Rather than worrying about eating a balanced diet or maintaining an active lifestyle, our advice is to spend as much time as possible in the gym hitting dumbbell curls until your biceps are crazy big.” — Dr. Willie Underwood III, American Medical Association president

WHEN THERE’S TREASURE BEHIND THE WATERFALL: Oh wow. Yes, very clever! Waterfall treasure! No one’s ever done that before. Lazy jackass WHEN THERE’S NO TREASURE BEHIND THE WATERFALL: Wow. Too stuck-up to put treasure there huh? Too much of a fucking ICONOCLAST for that? Piece of shit. FUCK you

HOCKEYG.BMF

DINOSAURS FOR HIRE

Tech Company: At long last, we have created the Vast and Trunkless Leg of Stone, Standing in the Desert from classic poem Ozymandias.

ok but pulitzer for whoever got this shot, it’s so good

See recent images of canine competitors riding the waves in surfing competitions for dogs, via The Atlantic Photo: theatln.tc/gzIZZkl2

this is your mission. our pedophile president needs you to show up in full combat gear on a hot summer day to the pool he filled with algae because he gave a paint job to one of his cigar puffing cronies. you are ordered to stop tourists from touching the green water. good luck soldier

mandatory reading

Will no one spare a thought for the secret boyfriend who has to decide whether “personal trainer” or “buddy from poker night” sounds more believable at the funeral?

Four-year-old just told his toddler sister “it’s time for the hunt” and they both left the room. Not my business

Minions director Pierre Coffin has confirmed in an interview that no minions have worked with Hitler because they were frozen "in that cave."

This is the best brand name I’ve seen in a while.

tired of the "#1 dad" nonsense. if you're a dad, stop treating it like a joke and post your actual national dad ranking. i'm # 492,018, which is actually really high up there, but more importantly it lets me enter ranked dad lobbies where i can get matched up for fistfights with dads of my caliber

The reflecting pool is being sabotaged by paid protistas

the brady bunch relies upon the early deaths of two parents. beneath your frivolous merriment there lies a foundation of bones

Here at the Reflecting Pool where a big chunk ofTrump's blue paint-apoxie has peeled off the bottom of the pool and is bobbling in the water.

Is the Microsoft Office Ribbon causing people to have fewer children? A provocative new working paper explores the persistent drop in birth rates since Office 2007 was introduced nearly two decades ago.

Solar Eclipse, Beginning (NASA, Hinode, 01/07/11) - From NASA Marshall Space Flight Center - https://flic.kr/p/9a1wvo

While his mountain of horrible personal conduct could fill multiple books, one fact in particular stands out: A year ago, Musk’s actions directly led to the deaths of hundreds of thousands of people. He did it knowingly. And, worse — gleefully. Read more: www.theverge.com/tech/949259/...

ok water calm down

(in the seventh month of defending a candidate who has slowly revealed himself to be a werewolf) so actually I think most guys get worse under the full moon

Bro everyone in this administration is clutching a 6 pack of mikes hard lemonade and having a tense conversation with Chris Hansen

I will respect the Microsoft AI that is being forced on all of us if it can generate a fake me for Teams meetings so I never have to turn my camera on

idk why everyone is complaining, i think it's cool that they are building the ship from CONTACT (1997) on the white house lawn. the liberal media says it won't work again but they are IGNORING that approximately 18 hours of static was recorded on that fateful day. explain THAT

YOU’RE LISTENING TO SISYPHUS FM, THE HOME OF NON-STOP ROCK

Classic win-now move. You have to give Pittsburgh credit for going for it while their championship window is open.

lol, they gave Artemis II astronaut (and Philadelphia sports fan) Christina Koch an astronaut Gritty

this is what you look like when you unlock all the pieces of your class legendary armor and then you’re idling in town next to the mailbox