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Lol. No he won’t.

Fully transparent like a ghost?

Lemme guess, fugue state…hiking the Appalachian Trail?

Looks like he saw a ghost... and the ghost was him.

She comes back with full GCS and facial feminization, welcome back Tammy Kean

I suspect he was going to lose anyway, but I think he will now lose by 8-10 points in November. NJ is getting bluer anyway, but the Republican brand is dead other than with racists and criminals (which may be overrepresented in central NJ, but not enough to keep him in office).

Any other job in the world, you disappear for four months, you no longer have a job. In this case, people barely noticed. Seem like Congress is very much overpaid if this is the standard.

Ok yeah sure uh huh…

Will his twin brother be with him, or are they gonna take turns appearing in public?

Bad case of hemorrhoids

I’ll bet.

Sure, Jan.

If he were any paler, he would be transparent.

Abducted by aliens?

Job abandonment usually gets people fired.

Pinky swear? Ok then.

Sex addiction?

It better involve time travel.

but if he's "fully transparent" how will we know....oh, I see 5,673 people have already beat me to that joke

Fully Transparent!? So THAT'S what happened !

is this legal? a paid elected official taking a 4 month vacation without anyone knowing why?

Was he sleeping in a coffin? Get that man in the sun

Did he get raptured to a Waffle House

So he says but remains to be seen

“Journalism” today is just holding up a phone and pressing the record button so they can mindlessly copy quotes on their AI generated “report”

He looks like a less fat Peter Griffin

He saw a ghost and it was real scary and he was hiding under the bed but he’s feeling better now

There's a perfectly innocent explanation. He was in jail.

lmao what are we? suckers?

This dude already looks like he got a lobotomy.

Alien abduction? Havana Syndrome? Stage V Ligma? Boneitis?

Try this at your job and see what happens.

Do McConnell next

Meaning he isn't and won't. Nice news missing headline which should be Kean is still doing questionsabouthis a sense. Once upon a time In the us we had reporters.Now we have spin.

www.forbes.com/sites/sarado...

Maybe he went through conversion therapy

Once winter returns this congressman will disappear to Cabo.

😱👆🚨🥶

Lycanthropy is a serious concern. We can't trust a congressman who can't work into the night hours and disparages the moon.

IOW, he will have a story as soon as his aides can figure out what it is.

He has been “transparent”for four months.

linke.to/Justin-Gaeth...

Will you be sending a stenographer?

Aliens. Im betting alien abduction

I put it to you he will not

This could get interesting.

In what way? Like his "nay vote" not to release the Trump-Epstein Pedofiles? Was he lawyer ing up in his absence?

Got bored making trades at home.

Dock his pay

He had to wait and see if the children were gonna report him or not based on this photo

So they're starting the weekend at Bernie's early?

Exorcisms are rough. Looks like it didn’t work.

How is he transparent when he won’t answer questions?

Ha. Michael would nail it.

How about a wacky workplace comedy version with Nick Kroll?

People who intend to be fully transparent always announce it days in advance. Especially when they could have just been transparent.

Fully transparent ? like a cow with a porthole to see its stomach? Less absurd than whatever Kean has been secretly doing

He had a problem. He took care of the problem. He no longer has a problem.

Me too

Calling it now - botched BBL.

Sure, Jan.

In spirit

He was caring for his turtles. Tom is a turtle man.

I stopped paying my mortgage four months ago but I’ll be fully transparent about why I did.

His wife forced him to to go to conversion camp.

Grand return? WTH is that? MSM sucks.

At least that *would* take four months (minimum)…

I remember thinking that my ex husband could have given him ten better excuses off the jump.

oh, deep cut 😂

Had to leave when his pregnancy started to show

Counterpoint: No, he won't.

this pet semetery reboot is gonna suck @stephenking.bsky.social

This feels like something a news organization would have investigated and known by now

Somehow I doubt we'll get full transparency.

Was he institutionalized and brain scrambled? He’s awfully pasty and clearly has been (locked?) inside somewhere.

He was in a spacecraft exposed to a special kind of radiation that turned him invisible. That’s CLEARLY what he means

Just in time to lose his seat.

We need the facts before he returns & his story should be invesigated before the GOP sanitizes his claims

he disappeared for 4 months because he found out one of his kids was trans?

His opponent is so strong — a military pilot mom with great ideas to support regular folks — he should just save his breath.

Was he hiking the Appalachians alone

Takes four months off and comes back on a short work week. Classic.

Why doesn't he say it now?

How much voting has he done without being present to do so?

He should be impeached and removed…same with Bitch McConnell.

Exactly. I've had to fight for any accommodation for disabilities in school and work and have even been fired for calling in sick and then ended up in the hospital in full blown diabetic ketoacidosis. I doubt he will have any empathy for disabled people. It will be "I touched grass, you can to."

That sounds like work. It’s much easier to tweet out vague bullshit and wait to be told what happened.

Best they can do is have a Republican and Democrat fight on live TV and give you the Kalshi odds.

Stenographers

He has a "concept" for transparency.

grand how

Id rather pay them to go away and do nothing until a more long term solution is in place 🤷🏻‍♀️

If you're pissed, imagine how his constituents feel. Even when he's showing up for work, he refuses to talk to anyone who'll ask him a simple question. Except for campaign contributors, of course. He has plenty of time for them.

Why do I get this vibe when I look at this guy?

Love to see him return with breasts, heels & makeup. Insisting he be called Thomasina.

Arrested in the Philippines for doing what Republicans do?

Holy shit what if he's the Invisible Man

I didn't notice he was gone.

The sentence was six months, but he got out early?

Hello mother, hello father, I missed you during my uneventful absence.

We all know what's coming, of course...

any other regular ass person would have been fired after literally a week of this shit these are the kings, truly, eating on tax payer dime for four months while doing fuck all fuck you, Tom Kean Jr, and fuck your stupid dad too, he raised a slacking grifter. Eat dirt, scumbag

I’m guessing not.

His absence marked with a mysterious sunburn and many souvenirs from Cancun.

If it has to do with transporting to a Waffle House I’m all ears.

damn i wish i could just take 4 months off my job

“A” Tuesday

Which tuesday? 🤔

Must be nice, do you think I would have a job if I disappeared for 4 months?! The audacity if these people.

have fun wasting your time with tom kean jr's twin brother, LOSERS

If he was abducted by aliens, he may not have been able to communicate with Earth

I am mad that aliens sent him back.