Post

Why

rdr2 horse testicle technology flashbacks

Next GTA feature: "Work a 9-5!"

I hated all of this stuff. Having to stop stealing cars and blowing stuff up to play a Healthy Bowel Movement minigame was not it.

Word is you have to make sure your car doesn’t run out of gas. How fun! Stopping to buy gas!!!

I heard the first mission there's a rat that tells the cops and you just spend the rest of the game in prison reading working out and sleeping and sometimes your character sleeps weird and you walk slower for the whole day

Its been so long since a new gta dropped that a lot of you forgot how to act, or just don't know cuz it's your first one.

In the 90s I used to say the sports games would get so real they'd make me realize how bad I sucked at sports. Turns out its the real life games

Yea no thanks.

😂 I hope you're joking nothing fun about unpaid taxes I'm hoping we get completely catfished and you can't steal anything or doing anything fun but you can watch the news and see npcs doing all the fun heists

Ah, that's what I want in a video game : tight schedule and chores.

Look, I know there is an overlap between people who like stat management games, and games where you drive cars and shoot people, but I'm not sure how many of them want to get the two flavors mixed together.

We’re reporting on getting featured from San Andreas? Should we have a bulletin about how you can drive the cars in this one next?

They saw the animal crossing boom and were like people love doing menial shit and that’s definitely why they play us. Let’s delay the game another 5 years.

This sounds boring

I don't have to take care of shit. I'm stuffing pierogies in their fat digital faces and Rockstar can't do a goddamn thing about it

San Andreas had the same thing and was a loved feature, I don't see why its a problem now?

Did it? I thought running was the same as V, once you build it up that's it. I really am getting old 🤣

Shakes fist

Very consistent with the AI market at least

There was a story that the boss wanted to put filling up at gas stations into it as early as San Andreas. The team told him that would be bollocks.

Just like life?

Now we know why there's no disc- so you can't sell it when you realise you hate this shit.

Both look really fucking unlikable and nothing special. It's wild how the main characters look like meh. Glad we got the white dude bro for the target audience though.

Aren’t those “survival” mechanics rather than RPG ones?

GTA characters will need to sleep more then the guys up all night playing GTA.

Every time I see a new headline about GTA 6 I say another prayer that its release rivals Duke Nukem Forever

What do you think is an RPG mechanic?

☝️🤓 erm axkshully you could gain/lose weight in Xenogears by eating food

My GTA 6 character will live a more disciplined, productive life than I do in the real world 😩

None of those systems mean anything. It's just time-wasting bar-filling in a game where death doesn't even mean anything.

So…Grand Theft Tamagotchi

No disc, no buy.

Immediately eating as much as I could to get as fat as I could in San Andreas while running around in heart covered boxers, boots and a cowboy hat made every cutscene a treat.

This sounds like the kind of feature Fable boasted. Back in 2004.

GTA 6: The Sims 4

"Remember how much you hated getting constantly distracted by your cousin in GTA4? We've brought back that mechanic, but worse!"

(Nobody wanted this)

Wow that sounds tedious

That, uh, sounds miserable.

That's a pity.

bsky.app/profile/sill...

Should probably point out that those aren't RPG mechanics those are survival mechanics. you stupid fucks.

lol got em

So it’s becoming Sim City?

Probably in the 99% range that you can skip all of this with some-sort of mechanic with semaglutide injections. I can only imagine what the brands are called, in-game.

Why does this just feel like an opportunity to sell a subscription to skip the parts you don't want to deal with and play the parts you do?

I'm familiar with the practice of adding unnecessary grind to pad out playtime, but that sounds faintly absurd.

We did this shit 20 years ago!

So it's San Andreas 2?

Sounds similar to San Andreas

So nobody remembers this from San Andreas? They're Life Sim mechanics, not RPG mechanics.

Whom amongst us hasn’t wanted to play a game where we do all the fucking bullshit that the Jersey Shore cast did off-screen.

Sounds awful.

If youre gonna give me rpg, i just want a skill tree. I dont wanna regularly exercise

So, San Andreas?

Punch Club 3 have awesome graphics!

In Ultima VII, thirty some years ago, you had to constantly feed your party. It sucked. We’ve known that since like 1990.

San Andreas already did the eating thing, it was bullshit. Why bother bringing it back? FFS this is supposed to be FUN!

Nope you hit someone their eye slowly swells up then you get arrested and spend the rest of the game in jail

So similar to the survival stuff Skyrim AE gave us that nobody plays

This is beginning to sound like the marketing for a certain other overpromising driving game. You'd think Take-Two would be familiar w/RIDE TO HELL:RETRIBUTION...

So it will be Tamagotchi?

They should make it so you can intentionally get your character fat so they can literally eat enemies like in Metal Slug.

Woooooooow such origional -_- It’s similar to samsung “inventing” a flip phone, something that has already ben done decades ago.

Cool, I always wanted my video game to be more like a fucking job And not in the fun way, either

Lol, fuck that

This sucks.

That sounds so boring. That's exactly what real life is like!

Playing through San Andreas right now and honestly it's such a miniscule portion. I maxed out my stamina and strength early on between missions and only have to reup every like 4 hours. Plus you can let yourself starve and be weak and still play the game.

"RPG mechanics" Riiiiiiight.

So, what? It's just open world Seaman?

they turned them into tamagachi?

GTA: Fable.

"We have you by the balls, so we're going to make you do all kinds of stupid shit to play our game." --- RockStar Games

I hear in this one you can take other people's cars and steal them

Hell yeah, San Andreas 2!

Looks like a cosmetic thing like it was in San Andreas, just ignore it 🤷🏻‍♂️

It tends to be that you can just ignore these bits and still complete the game. I hope so this time.

instead of spending $80-100 playing a game you wont enjoy you could spend under $2 on a sick tower defense game that is, alarmingly, also a buddhist koan store.steampowered.com/app/298360/I...

Perhaps this is what will finally kill the shitty trend toward realism in video games.

They've had this since San Andreas ffs

Sounds like a Tamagotchi

Groundbreaking "The Sims" technology.

Fuck that

Oh, like San Andreas did? On the PS2? In 2004? 22 years ago?

shit that's getting modded out day 0 of pc release:

it's not as raw a deal as it sounds; 6 years is the maximum, many of them will not make it that long

That much to play the worst possible version of the game? Ehfuq ehdat. Play old games.

Next they’ll have a physical copy of GTA 6 in the game so you can play GTA 6.

I thought the San Andreas mechanic of working out improving your hit damage and stamina was enjoyable enough. Unfortunately now I want to integrate GURPS and have a million skills to train and develop.

Go all the way. Make em buy health insurance and get a colonoscopy

will it have wierd side quest like yakuza gamesw

How does doomscrolling on your in game phone effect task difficulty?

People will immediately try to get as fat as possible, to see how far it goes. As they should.

Took me a while to realize this is not a @paletteswap.site post.

didn't they claim to have implemented this a few Grand Theft Autos ago? amazing how they thrive off of "Skyrim re-release but we made a new map and it's bigger"

Nah it was just a way to save the game and also restored health

What about filing taxes?

We had that shit in san andreas

Booooorinnggggggg

That's nothing new, though. That mechanic already existed in previous GTA games.

I wouldn't the muscle and fat mechanics from San Andreas RPG elements. I also wouldn't act like they were new since... you know... they were in San Andreas.

So, they're bringing back those mechanics from San Andreas?

second life dwight type shit