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Tis the The Season

I'm here for a gourd time, not a long time

Needs the Hugo award for scale

The pumpkining is real

That season again, eh? I'd rather have edible gourds in a nice soup or stew, but you do you, Mr. Scalzi.

Love it! The pumpkin postal worker eater!

It's the little things in life you treasure. -Galaxy Quest

I did almost give in to the temptation to purchase some decorative gourds yesterday but I think I will wait until October 1st. All proper like.

This is some 70s seed packet artwork ass autumn up in this bitch

You're pretty fun when you're maniacal and over a thousand miles away!

FUCK YES FALL UP IN THIS BITCH

I approve these posts. Best thing today so far. 10 out of 10.

You're www.youtube.com/watch?v=nkkj... But for Fall. It's perfect.

...And that concludes this week's Gardeners' World. Join us next week for more frenzied, nay, apopleptic and baffling commentary.

“Sweater weather” <checks local weather app> “98F - feels like 103F”

Our week of high 80’s is 5-degrees cooler than the norm and we are all very excited about it. Seriously. Not even joking.

It's 61 degrees in Boston right now.

Oo, Sara looks especially seasonal today!

AUTUMN, MOTHERFUCKER! DO YOU DO IT?!

I HAD NO IDEA A PUMPKIN SPICE LATTE HAD THIS MUCH CAFFEINE!

CHRIST ON THE CROSS, SCALZI.. WHAT IN THE MOTHER FUCKING GOURD IS HAPPENING HERE

John...

Fuckin A

It's 97° here currently, and this entire thread is giving me the will to live. 🎃🦇🧡💀

With the ceremonial release of a void kitten, the old gods of fall will be summoned. "Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn." Oops wrong old gods. Never mind!

Must you shout that it's pumpkin spice season? I've already OD'd on it, my head hurts

I can see that you are being very normal about fall.

Um, how much Coke Zero have you had today, John?

Samuel L Jackson does Halloween?

This event appears to have left you a little... 'overwrought'.

Is that a dead autumn leaf lying on the ground, in the midst of all this? It's definitely go time!

Scalzi this is INCREDIBLE AUTUMNAL MAGICKS

He is pleased with your offerings

Gotta say, I'm a bit jealous. Where I live, the overnight low temps are still above 70f. Enjoy your mug of autumn. 🍁🍵🍂 I'll catch up later!

THIS RANT IS AN AWESOME DISPLAY OF FULL FUCKING AUTUMN LEVEL WRITING BUT I WOULD EXPECT NOTHING ELSE FROM JOHN SCALZI NOW WHERE DID I PUT MY HOT SPICED APPLE CIDER

Very colorful, indeed.

But... but it's 84 degrees outside...

he's living the gourd life, you cukes.

AUTUMN CONFIRMED, WE GOT THEM HUGE ASS MUMS ALL UP IN THE MAHKIT BASKIT HEAH

“sweater weather as fuck” made me literally laugh out loud and is now my new favorite phrase.

This is probably the funniest thing I’ve seen all day. Thanks

I remember the day that aired. I laughed so hard I thought I was going to stop breathing!

but agreed. gorgeous.

lol I was going to recommend him laying off the pumpkin spice lattes but you may be onto something

i was wondering if it was that or Musquée de Provence; it's looking more like Cinderella's orange but more like MdP's heavier ribbing both're tasty! my fave is carol deppe's sweet meat oregon homestead. incredible flavour & texture! and the prettiest blue that fades to a gorgeous buff in storage

Yeah, decorative for my STOMACH.

The tone reminds me of the overexcited voiceover on John Oliver's show.

When tweakers hijack the Fall Festival. 🤣🎃

Last week, we had a high of 80, with a feels like of 87. This week? Yeah, get cozy.

\m/

In Gourd John Trusts. AND IT'S PUMPKIN **pie** SPICE, DAMMIT!

Are you okay John?

🤣

Mums suck as local pollinators. Add some asters to assist our pollen and nectar collecting friends.

This right here is Militant Autumnism.

That shellacked mutant vegetable is festive as shit!

Crazy how many of your followers apparently aren’t familiar with the classic McSweeney’s story.

@badstitch.bsky.social Oh, no. Thank you so much for telling me. I haven’t been following them so I didn’t know about the “special” kits. :( I won’t be sending them any more $$ and won’t recommend them in the future.

Thank you! I was planning to ask my wife where she got the pattern, and here you are. Perfect.

I have stitched this piece, too 😂

omg tell your wife she is awesome

🤣

Decorative Gord! Motherfuckers!

What the fuck? Watch your gourd damn language!

Easy, Action. We just stopped by for coffee.

Tis the season!

Also, I have the commemorative coffee mug, from a friend who knows me too well:

And the follow-up: www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/its...

My seasonal favorite

I came in here to make sure this got posted, I love McSweeney’s Internet Tendency.

never gets old!

It has been 100 degrees every day for 3 months here in Texas. So ready FOR MOTHERFUCKING AUTUMN!

It’s Mother-fucking decorative gourd season bitches!!

Now that looks cool. 🙌🔥

It is definitely not the same product when it is displayed on a variety of fake-ass backgrounds. store.mcsweeneys.net/products/it-...

I had coolass gourds that lasted past Christmas and one night I snuck around the apartment complex giggling like a mofo hiding funky pumpins where they could rot and sprout. Really scared one of the garbage guys. In spring, there were pumpkin vines EVERYWHERE and people were like wtf? Great fun.

I UNDERSTOOD THIS REFERENCE

does he know Bob the Tomato?

I need you to know that between you and dinniman it's become much easier to use literary luminaries as reasons to burn it all the fuck down. Totally unrelated, but nice punkin.

It's what?

your energy for autumn is so wonderful.

Because even the vastness of the stars pales before this mighty decorative gourd

I tip my imaginary mug of hot apple cider to you.

Fuck yeah, decorate gourd.

THIS SHIT IS SO SEASONAL!

Gourd Spice Season (tm) has arrived.

Gourdon Bennet

@kottke.org the beacon has been lit

Can you make a spicy latte out of it??

It's an alien spore pod!!! Kill it! Kill it now!

My wife texted me from Costco "It's decorative gourd season, motherfucker!" and I came home to these. God bless McSweeney's.

Autumnal AF!

On the off chance you’re an old school decorative gourd season enjoyer I feel compelled to let you know it can now be purchased as a coffee table book.

PUMPKIN SPICE ATTITUDE!! (Of course, it's not Fall until Tuesday....)