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For the first two, I'm not angry, just disappointed...

As an American tea drinker, I got a chuckle out of this one. That last one is for abominations only.

I boil the water in a kettle but I certainly don't make tea in it. Coz I'm sophisticated ebpnough to use a teapot!

I don't have an electric kettle (yet). I use a blue stove-top kettle to boil my water.

Heating the milk in the microwave first is grounds for divorce, apparently.

A UK kettle does say 3kW from 240V A US kettle is say 1.5kW from 120V. Maybe one day kettles in the US will include a battery so they can discharge to quickly boil water. 1 minute of 3kW is 50Wh battery.

Originally by the US embassy in London, methinks x.com/USAinUK/stat...

Y'don't make tea in a kettle, Randall. And the MOST angry you can make an Englishman is to pour warm water over a tea bag and add cold milk before saying "That'll be $3.50". US Deli Tea. Lukewarm watered milk with a soggy hackysack in it.

50% of brits wont eat their traditional foods. dont tell me how to make tea, wankers.

The Irish get way way more yet by about tea do not mess with tea in Ireland and make sure you know right answer to Barry’s or Lyon’s

You don’t make the tea in the kettle. You boil the water in there and make it elsewhere. I’d say, as a Brit, popping the tea bags in the kettle then boiling would be worse than microwaving the water.

How much bonus britrage does chanting 'Lizzie's in a box' while doing any of these buy me...? youtu.be/PSdxFccfgNI?...

This scale also works for Irish people. It’s one of the few times we absolutely side with the Brits.

Where does “never making or drinking any tea of any kind” go on the graph?

Making tea in a TEAPOT. If you make it in the KETTLE, everybody else who needs to use said electrical appliance will be very annoyed indeed.

Oh, dumping tea down into the sea like in the Boston tea party would be slightly to the left of the middle.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cold_br... Also, you should heat up the tea pot first to keep the water temperature hot enough for the tea leaves if you are hot brewing.

I don't want to hear it from a heathen empire that adds sugar.

Modifying a commercial brewing machine with a wifi connected controller to always keep tea ready 24/7 because when you tried it with a consumer grade machine it kept burning out elements.

I did not vote for the orange burger guy. The vote for his impeachment should have disqualified him from a second term . Joseph_R._Biden understood this when they tested his mental health .

Considering the godawful things Brits put tea through, and the absolute disaster of a substance they use for tea, they have zero standing to call out anyone else's tea making. I mean honestly. Using bags full of tea dust. It's like they WANT the tea to be bad.

Never knew a tea related post would make me feel so angry and disappointed at the same time.

I live with a Brit… it’s part in jest but also very real!

Chugging tea is both above and to the right of the line

I thought we made our tea by THROWING INTO BOSTON HARBOR! 🇺🇸🦅🫖 (Just kidding. Just adding fuel to the fire.)

who steeps their tea in a kettle? That's just for boiling the water. Just because it looks vaguely similar to a teapot doesn't mean it serves the same purpose

the brits have 'yank detectors' biologically infused into them. that's why we suddenly become passive-agressive.

The scale is logarithmic

Putting milk in first at +infinity if you know anything about us

How do they react to a gallon of sweet tea?

*sticks nose in air* I use a french press.

Cup of hot tap water with 10 year old tea bag in the saucer. Yes, something I have personably experienced.

We installed an Instahot just to make tea, and yes, we're Americans.

Did Matt Parker make you say this? PUT THE WORD ‘BANANA’ IN YOUR NEXT ALT-TEXT IF YOU NEED HELP.

Tea is the inferior hot water+plant drink. Hot bean juice for life.

I feel seen (Also, I microwave my ☕️ water. Sue me)

It would be preferable to the current situation here.

K-Cup must be off the charts to the right

@xkcd.bsky.social It's my impression that when you say "kettle" here, you mean the ceramic pitcher into which the hot water and tea are placed (teapot). Is this correct? Because lots of people think you mean to make it in the kettle in which you boiled the water on the stove.

It is extremely important how the hot water gets hot. IT IS EXTREMELY IMPORTANT

As an American converted to tea from many decades in Australia, I second this....

I was once desperate and truly lost in live so I cooked pasta in the microwave

That’s more of a coffee thing, really.

Yup, I use one regularly now :) The microwave approach has some guesswork involved in getting the right time to boil for a given mug and volume of water, plug it makes the mug really hot. But since most Americans don't have, need, or want a kettle to make tea like 3 times a year, microwaves are fine

For one cup (ab. 3dl, 9 oz)? Mine did it from cold tap temperature to boiling in 1min5sec. Show me the microwave that really boils a cup in 1min…

Why waste money on an extra appliance if I can use one I have already?

Just get a quooker, tea by just turning on the tap. Best invention ever.

And has access to the machine that will do exactly that.

Well a lot of cold water machines have the hot water tap but of the offices I have worked in don't have it plugged in. The joys of IT life. These same offices, oddly, have Keurig machines. The most expensive way to have a cup of ANYTHING. Might as well add a Sodastream.

Correction: not NHS Wales that insists on geysers

Including, and this is true, their tanks. I'm an American. You would think we would have free Coke and Pepsi for all employees because diabetes be damned. It's the American way. We don't though. Water usually is a privilege. This is why I have a 50oz thermos I take to work.

People who are, beyond a shadow of a doubt, worse than Hitler.

Alt text: "No, of course we don't microwave the mug WITH the teabag in it. We microwave the teabag separately."

Fill a Moka pot basket with tea leaves instead of coffee, pour cold water into the base, screw the top on and put on the stove over medium heat. I have never tried this because I don't have a lab coat or safety goggles. Or graph paper and clipboard.

Serving tea

This is so true. 😆

Glad someone mentioned this. Brits tend to prefer a fully oxidised black tea, which requires the water to be only fractionally short of boiling. Americans tend to have oolong (white), which should be brewed at 90°C, but they often try to do at 80°C, giving it the colour and appeal of urine.

I prefer to use the Boston Harbor to make tea, just dump in 342 crates of tea leaves

My husband tried to make tea in the kettle, but that was because he had dementia.

wow so i get to make british people mad as well, sick

I never understood the problem with using the microwave

What if you microwave it in a Tervis tumbler? Asking for a friend.

Microwave a mug

What do they think about adding a bunch of sugar and fermenting for 10 days?

Orwell sez: "…the pot should be warmed beforehand. This is better done by placing it on the hob than by the usual method of swilling it out with hot water." Is it? And why?

What if I boil the water in a kettle and steep it in a pot before putting it into my mug?

You missed "sun tea" , the absolute least angry way to make tea

Having to explain the difference between a kettle and a teapot.

Britain would have been fine with it if they'd boiled Boston Harbor in a kettle first.

The correct way to make tea www.youtube.com/watch?v=eob7...

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cold_br... YMMV, some tea taste awful when cold brewed, some meh, some actually not bad. But you need much longer to do so.

This is pure madness and I love it

Good ol' tumblr, gotta love it

I came here for this. One of the best bits of Internet if you ask me.

i say this because i know said person who responded to this post was british, not because of any preconception about who Owns Kettles

Squeezing the teabag is off the chart.

😂😂🤣

Bless your heart! To make tea, you put a cup of sugar and several teabags in a qallon jar, leave the jar out in the sun for several hours, stir it, and put in the fridge. That how you make tea! Oh, and you pour the cold tea into a tall glass over ice cubes. Yep, that's how you make tea!

Instructions unclear, microwaved the crown.

It can happen, but it's very rare, and only happens when very pure, still water is microwaved for far too long. If the water doesn't immediately boil over the first time it's jostled, it's not going to happen. In 40+ years of my life microwaving water, I have never experienced it.

If you microwave distilled water for too long it can become superheated and will boil aggressively the second it's exposed to a rough surfac, which can be dangerous. Any other liquid is fine though, since it already has surfaces where boiling can start.

that's a real thing which can happen, BUT only in very specific circumstances. as Christopher said, a wooden stir stick (or chopstick, or whatever) will prevent this. Here's a vid showing why (at about 5:30) with a full explanation from someone better at it than me

what an evocative onomatopoeia!

I've had this happen! A wooden stir stick will prevent it.

Time for a double blind tea taste test royale

where does the harbor rank on the scale?

making it using the stolen crown jewels is a flex IMO, Those decorative old folk don't need them

I used a Keurig machine for my hot* tea today. I used the same k-cup twice. (*as opposed to what? I drink my weight in orange-pekoe iced tea, when supply permits. unsweetened.)

"stolen from the crown jewels (that were stolen from someone else)"

Did @gailsimone.bsky.social write this?

I thought that was George Orwell's preferred way to do it? (Seriously: There's a video tape of George Orwell in the Spanish Civil War telling the camera his preferred way to make tea, and IIRC, he notes that he prefers to put the milk in the cup first.)

Eww.

this should not exist as a concept. anyone who does this needs to be sent to prince andrew.

This is why we use lemon or if you are going with ice tea sometimes you can go with orange juice.