Post

the fundamental disconnect between the manosphere and reality is that they are incapable of understanding that this is - according to every woman I’ve ever met - the sexiest thing a man has ever done

shauna@goldengateblond.bsky.social

eight years ago today we all watched the glory of zendaya falling madly in love with tom holland and the internet was never the same

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Yeah, it was so good Bruno Mars reached out to her and got her to star in a music video with him! It's a legit top 10 performance... against the GOAT. You can see she knows too in her reaction.

That look on her face which is probably thinking other things too, but one of them is, "Well, I had a good run, but nothing's going to outdo this."

As I said on Shauna's post, she crushes everyone on that season except maybe Anne Hathaway, only to lose to the internet most iconic clip. From all appearances Tom is a fantastic partner and wife guy, so she definitely also won in that regard.

It is incredibly frustrating that this is "not available in your country" - I've only ever seen Tom and not Zendaya.

I'd never seen Zendaya's performance before, and it was good. But Tom's is like an entirely different level of competition. Probably my 6th or 8th watch; never diminishes. Thanks for posting it. AND YES. This is what a *free* het man can look like.

I have been alerted by the comments that some people have never seen this before today and let me just say I’m delighted for all of you

almost all my replies are in enthusiastic agreement but it's pretty funny to see the ones that aren't "this isn't true" (wrong, read the rest of the replies) "you should meet better women" (wrong, blocked)

I (cis, hetero, amab) saw this video & thought "that's what peak masculinity is". I fell platonically in love. I've shown this video to every woman I've dated since (very few of them had seen it before) and usually they start out with no interest and by the end they're like "that changed my life".

One of the major threads in the most recent season of Shoresy is about putting it all out there for the person you're into. This is such a great example of doing that. He left nothing in reserve, and it showed.

He went out there and put all of his heart into the performance and was visibly having a blast doing it. As someone who falls in love all over again every time my girlfriend infodumps about her latest hyperfixation, I can attest that passion, genuine honest passion, is hot.

This got shared in a Discord I am in and the reaction was split. Half of us followed the ancient laws and watched it again because it came across our feeds. The other half had never seen it and became very aroused by Tom Holland. Not split by gender or orientation.

Don't you think it's a bit disingenuous to pretend like those same women wins have the same reaction to a guy of average looks, dance talent and choreography support? Instead of, yknow, laughing their asses off?

That was a boy, impressed by a girl, who reached DEEP into his lizard brain, found the primal instructions 'DO THE BEST DANCE SHE'S EVER SEEN' and did not let millions of years of mammal get in the way of victory.

Because CONFIDENCE is attractive. Being sure of your sexuality and owning it, THAT is what’s attractive. Not being afraid to be yourself and to enjoy things that aren’t “manly” is sexy. A lot of us who are attracted to men enjoy when men don’t take themselves so god damn seriously.

Weird Channing Tatum didn't save his marriage doing an equally fabulous & daring version of Beyonce's "Run the World (Girls)" for Jenna. Brosphere may have failed to recognize depth of the romance of those performances but more of "manosphere" are just frustrated @ unrealistic expectations.

I told my boyfriend that he had achieved honorary girlhood for being such a very good man - he said it was the biggest compliment a woman had ever paid him. Reader, I married him almost 35 years ago.

Met Husband when we were both doing theatre. He would frequently show up to dates with Wicked, Andrea Bocelli, or other "feminine" coded music playing in his ears. He nursed me through pneumonia when we lived 2 separate subway systems apart. ...Kiddo is 4 and also likes to nurture.

You took the words right out of my mouth. Women want to feel safe with their male partners. Hyper masculinity DOES NOT FEEL SAFE. A man who is talented but also doesn’t take himself too seriously? Now that’s … 🤤🤤🤤

My honey bought me the Hello Kitty toaster (it toasts Kitty's face on each slice) and walked down the street in his motorcycle leathers carrying the big pink Sanrio bag — oh I'm making your point, aren't I? Yeah, that kind of manly confidence IS super-sexy!

Pro wrestlers aside, the idea men had to be "jacked" to get a woman was a marketing hustle created by "men's" magazines in the 1990's like Maxim, Details & Men's Journal. It let them sell a ton of ads for gym equipment & supplements for the last 30 yrs. They do it to impress other men, not the gals.

That's the thing. It's not about one particularly shape, as long as he's healthy. If you're a lonely guy, it's probably because (a) women correctly sense that you're a deeply shitty person, or (b) you obviously don't take care of your body (which likely means you're a deeply shitty person.)

You can see Zendaya, one of the most beautiful, successful, desired women in the world, absolutely falling in love with Tom in real time during this drag performance. The manosphere is demented.

He did it with his whole heart, every last bit of it, and zero worries about what anybody might think of his masculinity. A man who is absolutely, unquestionably sincere is one of the most heart-poundingly, breathtakingly sexy things that can ever exist.

Not really. The Manosphere are predatory grifters. They absolutely know what all is going on, but in order to be able to grift they have to convince their marks that what is going on is wrong in some way and that the mark right in some way.

I read recently that conservative men are setting their dating profiles to say "moderate" or "apolitical" not because "conservative" scares women away, but because conservative women put too much pressure on them to perform this "alpha male" thing they keep going on about.

I just find it funny because I bet I could out manly 95% of them (sounding like a chest thumping dipshit but I can actually build and fix things), and a video game about cartoon cats in space made me cry last night. So no yeah no shit they don't wanna put their money where their mouths are.

they are 100% the type of women who, when out at a bar with a guy on date, will egg on some jacked up jock douche just to see if her man will defend her. in some cases even arranging matters ahead of time.

So, I never had seen this, though some corner of my brain knew it happened. I think it's worth pointing out that, many in the manosphere don't understand the absolute chutzpah it takes to do something like this. They do not have it, and they lack so much because of it.

Everything in the manosphere is to attract other men and pretend it attracts women who are byproducts of their behavior because these people don't actually love women.

I don't claim any expertise here, but I think a *lot* of what makes this magic is the utter commitment to the bit. It's not "ha ha I'm wearing a dress" -- dude learned the dance moves and went all out on them instead of half-assing it. Confidence without being cocky OR self conscious.

I won't speak for all women, but kinesthetics has a lot to do with sexual attractiveness. This boy moves beautifully. I am also reminded of how stunningly sexy Tim Curry was as Frankfurter. Partly it was his confidence, but also, man, that boy could _strut_.

And that's reflected in the commentary about it. Basically no one who talks about this performance calls it funny or hilarious; the words you see are things like amazing or incredible.

That was a movie I never felt was cast particularly for singing talent. Pierce Brosnan is the most obvious, but not only one there. Like, Meryl Streep is of course a great actor, but it's always weird to me when she's in a musical. Particularly with strong singers. Into The Woods was sure something

Yeah, I think a lot of people forget that he was a trained dancer well before being cast as Spider-Man. Also part of why he *is* such a good Spider-Man. You really want a dancer or gymnast or acrobat in that role.

I was thinking how different it would have been if Chris Pratt had done it - the whole vibe would have been parody instead of sincerity and it wouldn't have been hot.

because he went all in he harnessed his skill and potential and opened himself up to delivering the performance he'd been assigned, without prejudice and then he succeeded

This moment is more concentrated "male strength" or whatever phrasing the chuds would use for fortitude and self-confidence than exists in the entire "man-o-sphere" and all it's grifters. Also yes, it's the most attracted to a man i've been.

Holy hell. I’d only remembered the spectacle of it all and the reveal, he went SO HARD and absolutely nailed ALL of it my god Joseph Gordon-Levitt doing a faithful Janet Jackson was also pretty insane IIRC

He was the master of this. He did an absolutely masterful sync of Superbass by Niki Minaj, but unfortunately, quality video of it is hard to find now.

Ironically, it's also the moment that I realised that, 'you know what? Men can be very sexy and I am into that.' Thank you, Tom Holland, for helping me embrace my bi side.

The thing that I always point out is the moment he goes over to dance up on her, because it's such a perfect example of how enthusiastic consent doesn't have to be the whole huge Legalistic Thing the manosphere likes to mischaracterize it as.

He comes over, wiggles a little and positions himself to sexy dance up against her to make it clear what he's gonna do, then *looks back at her* and waits for her to whoop and waggle her hips and touch his shoulder before he actually does!

It's perfect and it happens in less than two seconds: communicate your desires/intentions in a clear fashion, allow the other person to respond, and wait for a clear indication they are participating enthusiastically and willingly before proceeding.

Is it *better* to do out loud (and make it clear that a "nah let's not" is also cool) with people you don't know, yes, especially taking into account social pressures to go along with things and the "freeze" and "fawn" responses, but those two seconds are such a great nonverbal consent check.